Saying goodbye to a loved one is difficult and can be unexpected. Every person handles grief differently and it’s the role of Aftercare Services to meet the unique needs of every donor family member. The kind voices of the aftercare team, which consists of employees Nikki and Emily, are often the first thing people hear when calling Mid-America Transplant’s Donor Family Priority Line.
“We wouldn’t be here without our donor families,” Nikki said. “First and foremost, we want to honor their loved one and help them along on their grief journey.”
She understands from personal experience how sensitive those calls can be for donor families as her own life was saved by organ donation in 2015.
Nikki, Donor Family Administrative Coordinator and transplant recipient
Nikki suffered from Type 1 diabetes, which forced her to depend on an insulin pump for survival. After more than twenty years of managing her diabetes, Nikki’s eyesight deteriorated, her blood pressure spiked, and low energy made everyday tasks overwhelming. In April of 2014, doctors diagnosed her with kidney failure, and she was listed for transplant he following year. In October of 2015, Nikki received a kidney and pancreas from a generous donor hero.
Grateful for her second chance, Nikki became a dedicated Mid-America Transplant volunteer, sharing her story of hope in schools, churches, and online. In August of 2022, she joined the staff of Mid-America as the Donor Family Administrative Coordinator.
Whether it’s offering a sympathetic ear for listening, facilitating correspondence between donor families and recipients, sending letters that communicate how a donor’s gift impacted others, or providing information on grief support and resources, Nikki’s experience informs her role as a liaison for families. “I do think being a recipient helps me to talk with donor families better,” she said.
It’s a role that she holds with pride and passion, knowing the power that organ donation has to transform lives. “These donor families are either saying ‘yes’ to the gift of life, or they’re honoring the decision their loved one has made,” she said. “Death is not an easy thing; you’re letting your loved one go, but with the hope that they will be able to either save or enhance someone’s life. And that’s a big deal.”
Nikki also enjoys facilitating donation-related events, including:
- Donor Family Workshops: On average, Mid-America Transplant hosts around five workshops every year. They’ve done workshops focusing on the holiday season, Dia de los Muertos, corresponding with recipients, etc. While each workshop has a different theme, attendees can participate in memory making activities, share their loved one’s story, meet other donor families, and learn tips for navigating their grief.
- Candlelight Memorials: Usually there are 3-4 candlelight memorials during the year: one each in St. Louis and Springfield, Missouri, and then one alternating between Cape Girardeau, Missouri and Jonesboro, Arkansas. These memorials are a way to honor donor heroes and those who have said yes to the gift of life in the past year.
In addition, the Aftercare Services team also coordinates sending donor medals and memorials to families, as well as any personal belongings or the blankets that volunteers make for donor heroes.
If a donor family member reaches out to inquire about grief resources, Nikki sends those, too. “We have all kinds of books and pamphlets that are pretty specific to someone’s grief,” she said. “For example, there’s one for a mom losing a child, a wife losing her husband, someone losing a loved one to suicide, etc. If they need to talk with someone to help them through this, I touch base and offer my support in whatever way they need. If I’m able to do it, I’ll help them the best that I can.”
Nikki says it’s a continuous way to show donor families that they care about them and want to help them along the often lonely journey with grief. And she knows the donor families appreciate every effort that they make.
“I had one donor mom come to an event for the first time, and she was very tearful. She said, ‘I think I’m in the wrong place. I shouldn’t be here.’ I introduced myself to her and said, ‘Who’s the loved one you are here to honor today?’ I find that once they talk about their loved one, it helps them feel more comfortable staying. That same donor mom became one of our biggest volunteers last year and has had tremendous growth. She said to me, ‘I love to come here to this building because I know this was the last place my son was.’ It just helps so much to be around other families who have gone through what they have.”
The Aftercare Services team coordinates sending donor medals and memorials to families, as well as any personal belongings or the blankets that volunteers make for donor heroes.
One part of her job that Nikki enjoys the most is when a donor family and recipient agree to meet, she gets to release their contact information and facilitate the reunion. “The recipients are so grateful for life,” she said. “And the donor families are so grateful that their loved one lives on in someone.”
“Again, it helps them in their grief journey to know that they’re okay, they’re doing well and everything is going great for them,” she added.
If you feel a calling toward organ donation, consider joining an organization committed to a lifesaving mission and find a rewarding career with Mid-America Transplant. View our current job openings.